It's a MAD MAD MAD world

Of sexuality and bullying

2010-10-03T14:40:00.000+07:00

This is going to be a short post.

A couple of days ago I read about the four teenagers who committed suicide in U.S because they were bullied for their sexuality. It broke my heart to know that these kids, who were supposed to be protected and who were supposed to be enjoying their youth, took their own lives because they couldn't be themselves.

How dare people judge other people for being different! This is a free world, you damn bigots! People have the right to choose, if that's even the right word, of what gender the people they love! And NO, this is NOT about preferences! Who says that we can choose whom we love? Who says that we can choose to love people of the opposite gender? NO ONE! And NOBODY has the fucking right to judge it!

So what if the religions in the world forbid homosexuals? Who the hell creates religions if not humans, anyway? Are those humans perfect? Are they sinless? Who are they to judge homosexuals? Who told them that they are sinless and have the right to cast the first stone? I believe every religion in this world teaches their people NOT TO JUDGE. If they condemn others for their sexuality, so who's going to hell now? Next time we want to say something about other people, think twice.

My heart goes to the dead children and for their families and friends. And for the bullies, may you rot in hell forever - you have the dead kids blood on your hands.

Writer Contest

2010-09-19T20:53:00.000+07:00

Hi guys, I know I haven't updated anything for a while now. I've been sick. I'm just going to post a quick something today...

A couple of days ago I entered a writer festival online. I hope everyone reading my blog can help take a look at my story and help vote for me. You can even leave comments and review the story (that will be awesome) if you want.

Click here to go to the story

Thank you very much! Have a great day!

Ps. I'm going to update something as soon as the flu go away. :)

Of greed and conscience

2010-08-12T00:49:00.000+07:00

Okay, so now I have something worth blogging about other than my usual ramble. A few days ago I overheard my mother talking to someone on the phone (honestly, I didn't eavesdrop on purpose!). I was a bit curious about what she was talking about so I asked her about it.

Apparently one of my mother's customers won a Honda Tiger on an annual lucky draw the company has. Now, this customer, an elderly woman, had no idea at all that she has won a motorbike. FYI, this kind of motorbike is quite expensive in my country (about $2,500-$3,000 per unit). So what's the deal, right? All my mom's got to do is telling her about her winning. And here's where it gets interesting. This customer - let's just call her Mrs. A - has a friend who's also my mother's customer. My mother doesn't get along well with this friend (and let's call her Mrs. B), but that's got nothing to do with my story here so I'll just skip it.

Mrs. B found out about Mrs. A's luck before my mother could tell Mrs. A. She went to Mrs. A's house and asked the poor old woman to give her the woman's real ID card and her member card, telling the unsuspecting woman that she's going to 'help' her enter the next lucky draw. Mrs. B also very kindly told Mrs. A that she was going to send her a box of bottled water and some uncooked rice.

The next day, my mother met Mrs. A and congratulated her for the motorbike. Mrs. A was so surprised and she said she knew nothing about it. She asked my mom what she would need to claim her winning and my mom told her about the ID card and the member card thing. Mrs. A told my mother that her so-called friend had visited her and asked to borrow her cards. My mother was shocked and she said that she would check on it later.

Guess what? That wicked Mrs. B had changed all the phone and address information on where to call and send the prize to her own phone number and home address, and she had made a forged letter (with a forged signature) saying that Mrs. A is letting her have the motorbike. It was stated in the form (my mother works directly under the company so she can check stuff like that)My mother immediately called the company and told her about the forgery thing so when Mrs. B called to transfer the tax, the company said that the prize has been suspended. Mrs. B actually had the gut to call Mrs. A and got mad at her for suspending her prize! that the winner tax will be paid before noon that very day.

To say that I was flabbergasted when I heard it is an understatement. I really can't believe it. How can people treat other people like that? She is her friend, for chrissake! Are things more valuable now than good impressions; than friendship? Doesn't she have fear of being found out? Oh, well, apparently not, considering how she treated Mrs. A after she knew that Mrs. A had taken some actions to stop her from stealing.

People never cease to amaze me with everything they are actually willing to do just to get an extra money. Sometimes I think that the saying that 'love makes the world goes round' is bullshit. It's not love that makes the world goes round. It's greed, people. And it's spreading like a plague.

Now the question is, do you think you will know that enough is enough? Or will greed possess your soul?

Of stupidity and overconfidence

2010-07-30T11:52:00.000+07:00

Ugh, I know it's been a while since I last posted anything and this is really not the way to start posting again, but okay, who cares.

I just did something utterly and totally stupid! I was trying to snag a little nap time before going to work (but of course I ended up lying half awake in my bed). Anyway, so this text message came when I was half awake. It was from my ex. He asked me how I was doing and all that harmless stuff. I replied to the text, definitely unaware of what I was typing. Then he texted me back, which I didn't read until just a couple of minutes ago. He said something that ticked me off so I replied asking him what he meant. He said I was the one who started it - using terms of endearment in my texts. I couldn't believe it so I checked my sent messages. I was like this-is-so-not-happening when I read what I typed. I thought I was typing to my current partner! Darnit!

Now of course the boy thought I still have feelings for him. Which I don't. Told him I'm currently in a relationship with someone else but he didn't listen. He never listens. Took me like two months to make him stop texting and calling me the time we broke up. *sighs* I guess I'm going to have to put up with him (again) for a while now. I feel so stupid.

Okay, end of ramble. I'm going to post something worthy of reading next time - soon. Not now, my head is about to explode. Well, I'm going to shut up now before I say something I might regret.

Ps. Screw my vow of no more coffee today. I need a cup!

Of the Gulf of Mexico oil spill

2010-07-13T20:11:00.002+07:00

Okay, this is outrageous! I am quite sure that everybody knows about the stupid oil spill that took place two months ago. It was all over the news and all and I wasn't going to say anything about it because I wanted to stay out of writing about political issues on my blog. I changed my mind after reading the newest articles on Yahoo! on how the spill affected baby animals.

No matter how difficult it is, I don't think people are working fast enough to clear the water from oil. And what is the US of A oh-so-great-and-charming president doing? TALK! Mere talk won't do anything to help those who suffer from the spill, you fool! Obama, you suck! (Go on arrest me, I'm not even your citizen and will never want to be).

He promised to 'give compensation' to oil spill victims and all. WTF. How do you think he will be able to compensate for the dying animals out there!

How will he compensate for this:

Or this:

All he did was talk and talk and talk. And these guys suffer. And I'm not even sure that he gives a damn about this thing now anyway.

I'm not a person who puts animals above humans, but I value animal lives as much as I value human lives and what I saw hurt me.

For further reading, you can go here, or here, or here.

Of the most romantic poem I've ever laid my eyes on

2010-07-02T16:20:00.001+07:00

Have you ever read a romantic poem before? This poem is on my top list of my most favorite love poems.

How Do I Love Thee

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

my soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

for the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of every day's

most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.

I love thee freely, as men strive for right.

I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.

I love thee with the passion put to use

in my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

with my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,

smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

-Elizabeth Barrett Browning-

The first time I read this poem was in my first year in college (2002). When I first read it, I thought it was the most romantic poem a person has ever made. But then, before college I had only read poems from the poets of my country (and believe me, they are very good!), so I thought that there might be more brilliant poems I would find in the future.

I was wrong. I read Shakespeare's, Robert Frost's, Jane Austen's, The Bronte sisters' (Emily's, Anne's, and Charlotte's) , D.H. Lawrence's (one of my faves, I'm going to write about him later), and many more. And I never, ever find more beautiful love poem.

No words I say could describe my feelings whenever I read this poem. I have tried do explicate (profiling the poem as well as the poet) the poem several times with no success.

I always think of Mrs. Browning as a very brave woman. Why do I think so? Because she lived in the Victorian period. Well, I don't know how women lived during that period but I'm quite sure that they were not used to expressing their feelings for a man so openly like she did. It could be uncommon, or even considered inappropriate.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning was a great woman. And hey, did you know that Edgar Alan Poe's famous poem, The Raven, was actually influenced by one of Mrs. Browning's poems?

Robert Browning was a damn lucky man to have the woman as his wife.

Of sleepover, crappy feeling, and common sense on people

2010-07-02T09:52:00.000+07:00

This is going to a semi ramble and semi rant post.

Last night my mother asked me to stay at my cousin's house. Generally I enjoy my stay there because that means I have some time alone, which I rarely can get at home. Well, the problem with sleeping over is... I think the souls in that house dislike me. LOL! No, I'm serious.

Every time I stay the night, I will have trouble falling asleep. The nightmares are usual, I have them at home, too. The difference is that I can always stay asleep until dawn at home. I kept on waking up every half an hour last night. I always feel tired in the morning - but never this tired. So today I feel slightly crappy. Ah, I really can't explain

Now off to my semi rant post.

I can't believe how arrogantly stupid some people get these days. No offense, I'm not referring to any of you here. It was not even eight in the morning and there were this two stupid people on the street:

So as I told you before, I woke up this morning feeling extra crappy. I went home riding the cousin's motorcycle (my new plate number isn't ready yet). I was on the right lane, and there came a flashy white car ON MY LANE! And guess what the driver did: He flashed me with his headlights! Feeling impressed was the last thing on my mind. It was crazy; who does he think he is?? Instead of going to HIS own lane; the man expected me to move away from him. And me, being me and feeling extra crappy, of course I didn't move. I went straight at him. I know that no one in their right mind would want to hit a motorcycle with a flashy car. He swerved to the left, back to his own lane on time, and I even got to shout at him. Ha!

And here's the second stupid person. I was about a kilometer from home when I saw my neighbor's car stopping in the middle of an intersection, half blocking people who wanted to turn left or go to that direction. People were honking at her. I was about to stop to see if she was okay when I passed the car. Guess what she was doing in the car? Eating snacks! OH MY DEAREST LORD!! What was she thinking? Wasn't she taught how to park?! She was not only endangering people but also herself!

I'm not trying to judge people here, as I know sometimes I do stupid things on the street as well. But I never, ever do it on purpose. Believe me, if I could force every single school in this country to do something, I'd force them to have common sense as a compulsory subject!

Of my favorite The Moffatts' songs

2010-06-30T22:46:00.004+07:00

If you were born in the early 80s (that makes you about 12-15 in mid 90s), you probably still remember a Canadian boyband called "The Moffatts". Well, if you don't, let me refresh your memory a bit - and introduced them to those who don't know them.

The Moffatts was composed of four brothers: Scott Moffatt, Clint Moffatt, Bob Moffatt, and Dave Moffatt. Clint, Bob and Dave are triplets. Their first album was released in 1995 (actually they released their very first album in 1994, but it was not a success). The band broke up in 2001. There are several rumors going on about their break-up: Some says that it was Scott who wanted to quit; others say that it was because their father couldn't accept Dave's sexuality. (click here for further reading)

Anyway, They released a few hit singles, and I like most of them (I still have them on my iPod playlist now). The video I share above (If Life is So Short) is my favorite song ever from The Moffatts. Doesn't mean that I don't like other songs.

If you are interested, you might want to check these songs: Girl of My Dream, Miss You Like Crazy, I'll be There for You, Misery, and If You Only Knew (feat. Gil). Oh, and another personal favorite, Until You Loved Me.

Listening to this song brings back a lot of nice memories. Well, if you have time, I'd love to hear what you think of it. Enjoy.

Of "Twilight" addiction

2010-06-29T15:42:00.003+07:00

Seriously, I don't understand what is so good about the "Twilight" Saga (both books and movies) that a lot of people are crazy about it. And no, we are not just talking about teenagers here. I read a lot about how adult women are also crazy about it - they nicknamed themselves as the 'Twilight Moms' (or the Twi-Moms); they wrote books on the subject; and they even have an official website on this. In one of the articles I read (I forget where, but I'll link it when I find it), it is mentioned that these women are actually abandoning their husbands and children and their responsibilities only to always be updated in some chat groups and all.

Is it worth it? There are always new films and new stuff to like in the future. This whole hype about Twilight and vampires will go away in a matter of weeks. But family stays forever, no matter how many new things come along. Is it worth it, risking your relationship with real people in real world over an addiction?

I read the books and I watched the movie so my opinion is not based on "what people say". The first three books, I have to admit, were quite interesting. I mean, any books that can get me to read them in one sitting is always good enough. The whole idea about a girl falling in love and getting married to a vampire was actually very creative, and the narration was good for a light reading. It was when I got to the third book that I changed my opinion.

I will be lying if I say that the first several chapters of the fourth book (Bella being pregnant with a vampire baby and all) weren't good. But somehow Stephanie Meyer bored me to death in the middle and by the end of the book, I was totally disappointed. It was like I was wasting my time reading the whole several hundreds of pages only to find out that the Volturi people decided not to attack the Cullens and everyone lived happily ever after. To say that I was disappointed is an understatement.

And when I thought I couldn't be more disappointed, the first movie was out. Everyone was crazy about it. Except me. It was, in my opinion, an awful adaptation on a not-that-good-anyway book! The guy who played Edward looked like a perv and his supposed-to-be father looked like a serial killer. And the famous "baseball scene" people keep on talking about was not as spectacular as I had imagined.

I haven't watched the second movie (New Moon) yet, and I most probably won't (I have enough share of bad movies this year). Of course the third movie will never be in my to-watch list. Ever.

Of ilnesses and death

2010-06-28T22:59:00.001+07:00

As a routine, I read every top news on Yahoo! before I go to bed. Sometimes I can find one or two interesting articles I really want to give my opinion on but I rarely have the chance since I am always either too tired or too busy to do that.

Anyway, I found an article which headline is "Americans are treated, and overtreated, to death". Basically, the article is about how a lot of sick people and their families overtreating their illnesses, even though the doctors say they are incurable. Sometimes it's the patients themselves who insist upon the treatments, but more often it's the families who can't let go.

It is very difficult when you find out that your loved ones get one of those scary illnesses. You fear for the worst; you are worried for them and you want to make sure they don't suffer much.

Death is one scary word for most people. Heck, even I think it is scary. To think that we will leave this world we know; that we will leave people we love; that we will be gone forever - well, that is enough to freak me out. But then again, is it really the people who leave who feel the fear? If you think so, then you are wrong. When you're gone, you're gone - hopefully to a better place - you no longer have any business with this present world.

It is those who are left behind who are afraid. I often imagine how my life would be if someday my mother passed away. 'Will I be able to cope?', 'Will I be able to move on?', 'Will I be able to take care of everything?'. Those are some the questions I'm sure everyone asks themselves when they deal with the death of a loved one. It is not wrong to think it or feel afraid. It's just normal.

So, back to the overtreating topic: Do you think it's the patients or the families who 'benefit' more from the long term treatments?

In my opinion, the prolonged treatments are usually useless for the patients. They only make them suffer longer, draining their energy, draining their lives.

Those treatments are made for the family members' peace of mind. Let's think about it; what would you feel if someone you love is dying and you don't give them the best treatments they can get? Guilty, I'm sure. And when all the best treatments fail, what would you feel? I bet the wave of fear would overcome you. You are afraid to let go. And that's why... you can't stop yourself from trying new medicine, new treatments. Because you don't want to let go. Why do you think the patients keep on going, even after they feel too tired to go on fighting? For you - the family.

Here is where the focus changes: the patients are no longer important; YOU become the important one - you and your fear of losing people you care about.

Now tell me, are we that selfish?

If one day I get so ill, I don't want to spend my last days in a hospital bed with tubes everywhere and needles poking into my skin. No. I want to spend my time somewhere peaceful - no doctors, no nurses, no nothing. There is a very slim possibility that people will do as I wish, but if they do, I'll make sure I'll tell them in the end that they do the right thing; that they don't steal my last lime light.

Of love, proposal, cheating, and heartache

2010-06-27T18:21:00.004+07:00

As I was browsing my LJ friends' page earlier, I came across my friend's post about proposal. She said her girlfriend proposed to her and she doesn't know what to do. I told her to accept, if she loves the girlfriend enough. She said she does love her girlfriend, but - and this is a big, big but - the woman cheated on her after she proposed. With a guy.

It got me thinking. What do people really think about love? I'm not talking about platonic, friend to friend love here, I'm talking about love between a person and another person, regardless of the genders. It seems that it is very easy nowadays for people to say the three magic words. If people don't really mean it, why do they have to say it so often? Has the phrase "I love you" become very cheap these days?

And do people really propose so easily these days? I mean, WOW! Proposing to the one you love is one big decision. When you say it, it means you are ready to spend your life with the person - the rest of your life. But I see that more and more people get married after only a few months of relationship, and I see that most of them end up in a divorce not long after. Look at this statistics. This is insane!

Marriage for me is forever. When you 'tie' yourself to a person, it is for until one of you leaves the earth. That means no matter what happens between you in the future, you stick to your vow. There may be some time when you ask yourself what you are doing with the person you marry; there may be some time when you think you made a mistake of getting married; there may be this time when you see someone else, someone 'better' than your spouse and you begin to wonder and regret your decision. Still, I think it is not a reason to cheat.

Some people may not realize it, but the pain of being cheated on will not go away that easily. And if you think that pain is the only thing it caused, you are wrong. There will always this feeling of being inadequate, of being not good enough. And the feelings are worse than pain - you carry them all the way. Even when they get into a new relationship, the insecurity will always lurk behind. And guess what, the insecurity will be one of the reasons of another broken relationship. A vicious, never-ending cycle, isn't it?

Starting Anew

2010-06-27T16:43:00.002+07:00

So I decided to delete all my previous posts and start again from the beginning. I guess I have to follow my own advice and start writing something I know, something that makes me frown or smile, or.. just anything. :)